


Strip For Me, Baby

by Blueeucalyptus



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Fluff and Humor, Levi is confused, Levi's POV, M/M, Sexual Content, Sexy Professor Erwin, and horny, stripper erwin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-21
Updated: 2019-09-21
Packaged: 2020-10-25 05:54:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20719190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blueeucalyptus/pseuds/Blueeucalyptus
Summary: Apparently Hanji made good on their threat and actually sent a stripper to Levi's home. At least blondie is hot, even if their Sexy College Professor act is so cliched.





	Strip For Me, Baby

**Author's Note:**

> NSFW?

Get drunk and lose your virginity to a stripper at College your "friends" will never let you forget it. Especially if their name is Hanji Zoë. Levi's accidental "accomplishment" has made him a legend his University and made Hanji, his long-time best friend a bigger pain in his ass. On top of never letting that incident go, anytime Levi's moody...well moodier than usual Hanji threatened to send a stripper his way to take out the "stick up his ass" and Hanji have been known to actually go through with their threat. The less Levi thinks about his wild 27th birthday the better.

That is why when the stripper, _Erwin Smith_ (definitely not his real name) or in Levi's mind _Sexy College Professor_ knocked on his door Levi was not at all surprised. This was another one of Hanji's harebrained schemes to get him laid. Worse still Levi actually considered taking it, after all, it's being a while...

* * *

_ **Forty Minutes Prior ** _

"So how long has it actually being?" Hanji asked pressing their flushed cheeks on the cold bar counter.

"None of your business," Levi bristled wiping his mouth after taking a shot.

"Come on, you can tell me."

"Please Shut Up!" 

"Hmm, let me think last one was named Jörg and that was three months ago. Whoa! no wonder why you are so pi-"

Levi grabbed Hanji's cheeks and squeezed. "Please. Shut. The. Fuck. Up."

Hanji wiped Levi's fingers from their face and giggled, "So moody, though when aren't you ever."

Levi rolled his eyes and waved at the barman that he was ready to pay.

"No wait," Hanji begged grabbing onto his pearl-white sleeve of his work shirt. "Don't go, it's still early-"

Levi shook Hanji's hand away and said, "I have work tomorrow and unlike you, I don't have a boyfriend who will cover for me when I'm recovering from a hangover at work."

"Wait! Wait!" Hanji shouted a bit too loudly and some people at the pub threw them a dirty look. Hanji was typing on their phone before shoving the screen at Levi and asked, "Sexy teacher or Tarzan?"

Levi shoved the screen full of strippers back at Hanji and growled, "Fuck off!"

On his Uber back to his house, Levi ignored the texts that Hanji bombarded on his phone. Hanji is particularly annoying when they are drunk, not that they have any filter normally, but when drunk whatever little manners they do have go straight out the window. Levi did however, made sure to text Moblit though before he left the bar, the last thing he wanted was for Hanji to say something inappropriate to the wrong person and get into a fight. They will win but he rather not bail Hanji out from jail, again.

Moblit replied back saying, _Thank you, be there in 5 minutes._

The car pulled over to his driveway of Levi's small townhouse and he got off. The sun is yet to set and looking over he could see a white car on his old neighbours recently sold house. Levi hoped this new one doesn't have a dog that shits on his yard. 

Inside his home, Levi poured a whiskey, as he needed something strong to get him drunk and forget his sorrows. Hanji wasn't off the mark, it has being a very long time since he _got some._ Late night jerking off to faceless men on his laptop barely managed to satisfy him. Levi knew if he wanted to he can find someone willing to spend the night, but it's his damn job, it's been killing him. Thank god the project finished today and Levi can have some respite. Maybe he should reinstall Grindr back to his phone. He is getting kind of desper-

The doorbell rang and Levi narrowed his eyes, he wasn't expecting company and all of his friends no better than to come to his house unannounced, even Hanji. Standing on his tiptoes Levi looked over the peephole on his door. An unfamiliar tall, blond man with ugly, black-rimmed glasses was waiting expectantly at his door.

Curious Levi opens the door and the moment he took a look at all six-foot-two and Greek statue of a man, Levi knew exactly who he was. The badly fitted, white shirt, grey pants, aqua sweater vest which still failed to hide the body that put Captain America to shame kinda gave it away.

"Hi," the stranger began waving his hand, "My name is Erwin Smith. I'm-"

"-Oh, no need to introduce yourself I know exactly who you are," Levi interrupted taking a lengthy glance at the 'Man' in front of him. Levi really liked what he saw.

"-You do?" the strangers asked, squirming a little at Levi's hungry gaze at him. His cheeks were blushed adorably.

_'Huh, playing shy must be part of the act. Though those fake glasses are kind of an overkill. Hope that's the first thing he takes off.'_

"Yeah, College Professor right?"

"Yes, how did you know?"

"-Lucky guess," Levi said rolling his eyes as if it wasn't obvious what persona _Erwin Smith_ (definitely a fake name) was going for.

He should slam the door on this guys face but Levi's desperate and he haven't had anyone touch him for three months. Who knows after the strip show he can ask Erwin to stay a little bit longer to do to do_ other things._

"Well you might as well come inside," Levi said pointing Erwin towards the inside of his house with a whiskey cup still on his hand.

The blond man looked reluctant for a moment but in the end, relented walked inside the room while Levi shut the door behind him.

Looking at the man's strong, solid back, Levi thought that even if he doesn't get lucky he really has to commend Hanji for their pick because _'What A Man!' _He's still not sure how the stripper's perky, thick ass looks so good underneath those baggy pants. 

"Want a drink?" Levi asked from the kitchen that stood in the middle of the house between the dining room and the Living room.

Erwin shook his head and said, "Thank you but I don't drink on workdays."

Levi shrugged and poured up another shot of whiskey on to his glass. 

"I don't think I caught your name." "

Hanji didn't tell you?" Levi asked, twisting the cap back on the whiskey bottle.

"No, they just told me they had a friend in this neighbourhood but I didn't-"

Levi interrupted the man and introduced himself "-Levi." He was eager to get started as soon as possible and see the body underneath the clothes; which Levi can only assume was picked out at a second-hand store that exclusively sold outfits of elderly College Professors.

"Have you being living here for long?" Erwin asked.

_'He's a chatty one,'_ Levi thought with a sigh before turning around to face the man who was still fully clothed. "About three years," Levi replied back. Levi was confused usually at this point the music will be on, the stripper would at least be shirtless and dry humping his chair from the back. This was not an act Levi was familiar with. However, remembering the man's blush from before. 'Maybe the shyness is not just part of the persona.' Levi wondered and if this was a new type of act, maybe he is meant to take charge. _'Alright, Erwin Smith I'll play your little game.'_

Levi pulled one of his lounge chairs in the living room and turned it around to face Erwin. "Don't worry I understand," Levi said sitting down his legs spread wide and his elbow on the armrest with his whiskey hanging over. He loosened his tie and ran a ravenous gaze down at the gorgeous man in front of him; paying special attention to that well-endowed chest and thick thighs. Oh yes, Levi has no problem with working with what he got.

The taller man looked down at Levi gaze and an adorable cherry-red flush that spanned through his entire chiselled face. Even up to the tip of his aquiline nose. The man squirmed where he stood and dipped his ocean blue eyes. 

Levi may have never experienced it, but he's already loving the shy act. The men who Hanji usually send to his house are full of confidence, with testosterone oozing out of each of their pores and very dominant. Levi had no problem changing things up and taking charge for once. "Shall we get started, Professor?" Levi asked sultrily, prompting Erwin to meet his bespectacled eyes with Levi once more._ 'Yes, those glasses will be the first to go'_

"I don't know what's happening," Erwin said with an awkward, half-chuckle. 

"Don't worry _Professor_ I know exactly what I want."

"You do?"

"Take off those glasses and your top. I want to see what's underneath all of those layers."

"Uh-"

"I'm waiting-"

"-Don't you think we are moving too fast-"

"Am I going too fast? Sorry baby, we can go as slow as you want," Levi said taking a sip of his whiskey and asked, "Want me to help?"

Erwin put his hands up to indicate to stop, his face has turned even more impossibly red, "Look, Levi, I'm flattered. I think you are cute but I don't really like to do these type of things until at least the fourth date-"

onfused, Levi moved forward on his chair with furrowed brows, "Date? What are you talking about?" Levi asked annoyed, he went along with Erwin's little game and now he throws another curveball. "I just want you to strip for me."

"Strip?" Erwin asked his hands crossed over his chest. "I-uh. I don't what you are talking about."

"You are stripper right?" Levi asked vexed since he didn't understand where this conversation was going.

"Wait you think I'm a stripper?"

"Aren't you?" Levi queried with his stomach dropping. _'Please god, just be a stripper!'_

"Ah that explains everything," Erwin said, nodding his head, "No, I'm not a stripper I'm afraid, I'm Erwin Smith, I'm your new neighbour. I bought Keith Shadis' old house-" 

Levi's fingers slacked and the glass on his hand dropped and the whiskey tipped and absorbed into the carpeted floor, "-Fuck me!" Levi blurted out and the heat bloomed face as he stood up. _'Shit! Shit! Shit!'_ Levi thought as his head ran mile-a-second wondering how he can ever come back from this.

He even half-expected Erwin to call the cops on him for what he just did. Levi precariously turned his face towards the man who was keeled over the kitchen counter, laughing. If Levi didn't think the man was hot, he would have called laugh creepy. His bright blue-eyes have widened maniacally, he showed too many teeth as he giggled and the laugh sounded something you hear from a stereotypical dad.

It was not the reaction he was expecting. Levi was sure the man would get angry at him or just walk out of his home and never speak to him again. Eventually, Erwin's laughter subsided and he wiped the tears in his eyes. In between random bursts of giggles that came out of his, Erwin said, "I'm sor-sorry but that was really- *giggle* -the funniest thing- *giggle* that happened to me in a while- *giggle* your face- *giggle* when I said I wasn't a stripper *giggle*

The laughter began once more and even Levi wasn't immuned and he chuckled with the man. This was certainly the best reaction he could hope for. After his laughter receded, Erwin asked, "Do you often have strippers in your home?"

"No!" Levi quickly blurted out, "It's Hanji, they hire them out as a joke and usually, I shut the door on them but it's being a dry few-" Levi stopped himself before he said too much but looking at Erwin's eyes, he understood. "I'm sorry about all of this," Levi apologised, sincerely.

"It's fine," Erwin said, waving his hand in reassurance and he put out his hand and added, "Let me introduce myself again, My name is Erwin Smith. I'm a College Professor but a real one, not of the stripper kind." Levi took Erwin's hand and said, "I'm Levi Ackerman and I swear I don't think all my guests are strippers."

"Nice to meet you Levi."

"and Nice to meet you, Erwin. Please let me make it up to you."

"You don't have to."

"I want to, Please. How about dinner here on Saturday night? It's the least I do." 

Erwin thought about it for a moment, before he said, "I would like that, but I can't say there will be any stripping in my part." Levi's ears turned red but he quipped, "I don't know, you might after I bring out some of the wine."

* * *

Erwin didn't strip for Levi on Saturday night at dinner. In fact, Levi's neighbour never did. After that fateful incident on Thursday night, Levi never let any strippers through his house or near him ever agin. 

However, he did make an exception for his husband one and half years later on their wedding night. Apparently, when Erwin said to Levi he's taking an extra hour to tutor his students the last couple of months, he was actually attending a classes on how to strip dance. Let's just say that on his wedding night, Levi came twice from Erwin's Sexy Professor act and this before any of his own clothes came off.

\- The End


End file.
